Procrastination — What Are You Putting Off?
Most procrastination doesn’t look lazy.
It looks productive.
You answer emails. Sit in meetings. Solve small problems. Cross easy things off your to-do list. Meanwhile, the thing you need to deal with quietly sits in the background.
Waiting.
Usually, it’s a conversation.
A difficult conversation with an employee whose performance has slipped. A tense discussion with a business partner. Honest feedback you know someone needs to hear. Or an uncomfortable conversation in your personal life that you keep replaying in your head because you’re worried about how the other person will react.
Most procrastination isn’t about laziness or poor time management.
It’s about avoiding discomfort.
The things we avoid rarely shrink with time. They grow.
The tension grows.
The stories we tell ourselves grow.
The stress grows.
Meanwhile, the issue quietly drains our energy in the background.
I was recently talking with a business owner who had been avoiding a conversation with a senior team member for months.
The employee was talented, well-liked, and important to the company. But there were growing issues:
- missed deadlines
- communication problems
- tension with others team members
The owner knew the conversation needed to happen. Everyone around him knew it too.
But every time he thought about addressing it, he found reasons to delay:
“This isn’t the right week.”
“Things are already stressful.”
“Maybe things will improve.”
Meanwhile, the problem kept getting bigger.
What struck me most was this:
The actual conversation lasted less than an hour.
But he had spent months emotionally carrying it.
That’s what procrastination often is:
Prolonged emotional avoidance.
I’ve seen leaders make million-dollar business decisions quickly while delaying a difficult employee conversation for weeks because operational problems are often easier to solve than emotional ones.
The irony is that the anticipation is usually worse than the conversation itself.
One thing I’ve learned over the years is this: before you have a difficult conversation, start with the end in mind.
Ask yourself:
- What outcome do I actually want?
- What would success look like?
- What relationship am I hoping to preserve or improve?
- How do I want the other person to feel afterward?
The goal should not be to “win” the conversation.
The goal should be to improve the situation.
That shift matters.
When you focus only on the fear of the conversation, your mind creates anxiety. When you focus on the desired outcome, you create clarity.
Preparation helps tremendously.
Most leaders spend far more time worrying about difficult conversations than preparing for them.
Before having an important discussion:
- outline the key points you need to communicate
- think through possible reactions
- rehearse your opening out loud
- focus on clarity instead of perfection
Professional athletes rehearse. Speakers rehearse. Great leaders rehearse difficult conversations too.
Sometimes that means taking a walk and talking it through out loud. Sometimes it means writing down your opening sentences beforehand so you don’t begin emotionally or defensively.
The more prepared you are, the calmer and clearer you’ll be.
Another trap people fall into is waiting for the “perfect time.”
There is rarely a perfect time.
The longer you wait:
- anxiety builds
- resentment builds
- confidence decreases
- the conversation becomes larger in your mind than it actually is
And in leadership, teams often already know when something is being avoided. Silence creates uncertainty, and uncertainty creates distraction.
Avoidance creates temporary relief, but it almost always creates long-term stress.
Once people finally have the conversation they’ve been avoiding, they often feel immediate relief.
Not because everything was magically solved, but because clarity replaced uncertainty.
Momentum returns.
One of the most common things I hear afterward is:
“That wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be.”
Why?
Because movement feels better than avoidance.
Courage is not the absence of fear. Courage is deciding that moving forward matters more than staying comfortable.
So let me ask you something:
What are you putting off right now?
Is there a conversation you need to have with someone on your team? A customer? A business partner? A family member?
And what would improve if you handled it this week instead of next month?
Some of the greatest growth in business and life comes from the conversations we least want to have. The hard conversations are often the doorway to better relationships, stronger leadership, healthier teams, and greater peace of mind.
Prepare yourself.
Start with the end in mind.
Outline it.
Rehearse it.
Then take the plunge.
You’ll often discover that the thing you were avoiding is exactly what allows you to move forward.
Onward and Upward,
Executive Coaching and Consulting for business CEOs, Owners and Presidents
If you are looking to grow your business or amplify your personal leadership skills, I would love to have a conversation with you. You can email me at karen@karencaplan.com for a no obligation conversation.
