If you are well known or have been around for a while (i.e. over 40ish), it’s not hard to be taken seriously. But if you are early in your career or not known by your audience, there are a few things you can do to help establish your gravitas (I consider gravitas a boomer word, that means seriousness and importance of manner).
First – consider your dress. One of my clients is a professional speaker and trainer and early in her career, she was told to wear a color that stands out. For whatever reason, she was told to wear pink when she spoke. Like Barbie or Legally Blonde pink (and coincidentally she is a blond). She confided in me that this color felt limiting and “not right”, but she was taking the advice of a professional advisor.
One day, she decided to wear black when she presented, and she told me that the difference was palpable. She could tell that her audience was taking her message more seriously. When I saw her recently, she was in all black. She told me she only wears black now when she speaks– as it has changed the way she is perceived. And her business has grown significantly as she is being booked more often. In fact, one of her clients commented to her that he almost didn’t hire her because her website featured so much pink – it didn’t give the perception of a serious business speaker.
One of my other clients is a mid-30s male company president and he looks younger than his age or experience. Early in our working relationship I suggested he purchase black, button-down shirts, black slacks, etc. He was doing a lot of internal and external presentations, and I didn’t want his age or appearance to reduce his effectiveness. At first, he was taken back by my suggestion, but did notice how differently he was received when he dressed in all black. Appearances do matter.
Second – consider the tone of your voice and any annoying habits you might have. When you get nervous, do you ever find yourself speaking quickly (rushing) or the pitch of your voice becoming elevated? We may not realize that this happens, but the people we speak with can tell this right away. And if someone can tell you are nervous, it gives them more leverage in negotiating with you. The best way to reduce the chance of this happening is to practice.
- Practice in front of a mirror
- Practice in the car when you are driving somewhere
- Record yourself on your mobile phone and play it back. Critique yourself.
- Practice in front of someone and ask them to give you feedback
- And if the pitch of your voice tends to get elevated, then practice speaking more slowly and speaking from “your gut” (the lower part of your lungs) – vs from your throat. That will immediately help you lower your voice.
And what about those annoying habits? Some people tend to add the word “like” before every sentence. Like, I’m serious about this. Like, I don’t think you know you do this. When you record yourself, you should count how many times you say “like”. Consciously pause each time you want to insert the word “like”. It is likely caused by nervousness or is just a bad habit. Unfortunately, in the business world, it is a sign of a lack of confidence and professionalism.
Giggling is another annoying habit. You may not know that you giggle when you get nervous, or when you are not confident in something you are saying but it’s a sure sign giveaway and again, signifies a lack of confidence or professionalism. Other annoying habits to be aware of: picking your nails, twirling your hair, or clearing your throat. I’m sure you can think of many more. Ask your spouse, partner, or coworker – I’m sure they will tell you.
And third – when in doubt, wear a jacket. As I think about easy ways for people to be taken seriously, the simple addition of a jacket to whatever you are wearing signals you are serious, professional, and put together. Even if you are wearing a tee shirt at a trade show – add a jacket. On a zoom meeting with a client, wear a jacket. If you are having a meeting with a client and you know their dress code is business casual, throw a jacket (no tie) over your shirt and jeans or dress. It will subtly indicate you are there to do business…
We all need any extra edge we can get in business. Whether we are being interviewed for a job, leading a meeting, or giving a presentation.
And as the employment market continues to shift, these suggestions could make a world of difference.
Onward and Upward,
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